I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
you made sure you came back for your bottle of vodka but didn't remember to take your shoes
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
Randomize
