i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Randomize
