Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Drunk is a universal language darling
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize