There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Randomize
