we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I think people are normalizing furries
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
i need to get crying drunk at the bar more often. i end up going home with guys who have big penises. its like God is saying "there, there, this will cheer you up".
Randomize
