Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
"he sent me a picture of a puppy in return for a picture of my boobs. He then captioned it with "look it's puppies first time at the beach". "
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
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