Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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