bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
It's my birthday, dammit, and I'm getting something for free. I don't care if it's just a drink at the bar.
YOU CAN GET THIS DICK FOR FREE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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