from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
Randomize
