Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
