it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Randomize
