im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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