Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
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