2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
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I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
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did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
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