"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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