Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize