I just had one of those nervous system things in my thumb...I'm pretty sure I have cancer.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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