im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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