phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
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