I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
New low: just got woken up by my 9 year old cousin throwing an empty at me and telling me to get my life together.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Came so hard when I was riding him that I actually bit some of his chest hair off. He said I was the first girl ever to do THAT.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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