walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize