We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Went to mcdonalds... Wishing I could throw up the last 20 hours of my life.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
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