Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Randomize
