Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
it was like eating out sand paper
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
Randomize
