ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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