There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
