i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
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