im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
