So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Randomize
