need another drink. this is the easiest way
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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