so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Uh, do you remember who's thong is in my tree?
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize