Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
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