i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
