Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
You some how ended up sleeping on one of the beams that run along the ceiling of your house
Randomize
