I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Randomize
