Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
After I chugged my beer the cop slapped my ass and said "atta girl" this can't be real life.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize