My hair reeks of homosexuality.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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