dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
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