how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
