Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Being engaged is strange. I looked at my cock this morning and said, "we did alright these last 32 years, right?"
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
Randomize
