What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
