Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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