Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Dude she looks like a female richard gere plus 400 pounds.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
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