Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Someone brought brownies to work and I was skeptical to eat one then I remembered I was at work and there is no way there is weed in them. Haha I'm blaming you for that.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
