if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
What is a reasonable amount of condoms to keep in my condom wallet without it being creepy that I have too many?
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
This Cougar is looking at me like I’m a piece of meat and buying me top shelf cocktails
I’m getting a fear boner thinking about what she might do to me
Randomize