I'm really into asian looking animals
you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
...so i touched it.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
