i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
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