In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I got laid and laid off at a conference in long beach all on the same day
Eh. They balance each other out
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
