so let's talk penis.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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