Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I bet he comes in French.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
My breasts were aching with rage.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
