Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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